Happy Birthday, Clara Ann!

I am blown away that another year has come and gone. It seems just yesterday that I was holding my darling daughter in my arms. It's crazy to think that Abe and I now have a two year old. Clara is such a big part of our lives and not a day goes by that we don't think of our sweet Clara.

Flowers from Jamie, Kayla, Aunt Celeste and other family

Ten weeks ago, I decided I was going to train for my very first half marathon and do it August 4th, for Clara's birthday. I figured it would be something good for me to do with Abe being deployed and would help me to get through Clara's birthday. I trained for ten full weeks. It was a big comitment, but I can honestly say I enjoyed doing it. As I got further into my training I got better and better and I felt confident that I would do just fine on race day. I felt like I set a realistic goal of completing it in two hours and ten minutes based on all my training. While training I made sure that I had decent terrain so I would be good and ready.

So... Yesterday was race day and it definitely wasn't what I was prepared or trained for. The elevation was 10,000 ft. and the little hills we saw on the elevation chart turned out to be big, mile long hills. It was BRUTAL! When it got hard it was so frustrating and I felt like I was letting Clara down. I completed the race in two hours twenty-nine minutes. I'll admit, I was definitely disappointed I didn't make my goal time, but I was very happy that I at least completed it.

Sister, Connie, me, and sister-in-law, Brandi

Abe was so wonderful and supportive during my training. He encouraged me and was cheering for me from afar. I wasn't too excited to tell him about my time. He called and I told him about my experience. He truly was inspired by what he said to me. It was so amazing that I asked him to write down what he said so I wouldn't forget it. After asking him he told me it would be okay if I blogged about it. Here is what he said:

Grace,

So here are my thoughts on your half-marathon:

I think your run is symbolic of everything that happened with Clara. The first example being that I wasn't there to support you through the run. Although I could encourage you from here, I couldn't actually be there to help you through it. It was something that you did by yourself (with support from Clara). Also, everything started off great with Clara but it quickly got more difficult and became a struggle. We never imagined that things would go the way they did. We were blissfully unaware of the challenges that lay ahead. The run was the same way: you thought it was going to be all downhill, but instead only the first part was. The run quickly moved into difficult hills that made it much more challenging. Clara was the same way. Once we found out all the problems, things became much harder than we had anticipated. Just like you pushed through with Clara through the difficult parts, you didn't give up on the run and you pushed yourself to finish in spite of the difficulties. I think this was the perfect half-marathon for you to run in honor of Clara. I know you are a little disappointed that your time wasn't exactly what you wanted, but I don't think it's a coincidence that the run almost perfectly mirrors your experiences with Clara. We weren't expecting our first baby to be taken from us, but I wouldn't change or trade our experience with Clara Ann for anything.

I hope you know that I'm so proud of you for doing this. Clara has an amazing mother. She's the luckiest little girl in the world.

I love you.

Abe

I have to say, when coming up on the finish line I got very emotional and couldn't believe I had completed my run for Clara. My brother, Jimmy, was there to meet me at the finish line and gave me the biggest hug and let me cry in his arms. I am so grateful for the family and friends who have been there to help me through his experience with Clara. I pretty much feel like the luckiest woman alive having the sweetest husband and such a special, beautiful daughter. I couldn't be more blessed.

Thank you so much to everyone who has been there for me. Words can't say how much I love and appreciate you.

Happy Birthday, my sweet little Clara! Mama loves you SO much!

Picture Abe helped Clara draw for me.